Breaking up with a girl that you are still in love with is difficult. It’s even worse if you see your ex-girlfriend has moved on with a new guy whom she seems to be happy with. Sometimes, the decision to break up with your ex doesn’t feel right and you may want to get back with her. But, is it possible, do you still stand a chance to save your relationship?
It is still possible to get your ex-girlfriend back even if she’s dating someone else. There are 2 scenarios that you can get your ex-girlfriend back. One, if you were together for at least more than 3 months, and two if you two had a good relationship and shared a meaningful connection.
So, for starters, you will have to take time and study the details to devise the best means of getting your girlfriend back. Avoid chasing after her or panicking as the more you declare your love, the less the chances of getting her back are. Let’s see some of the best ways to get your ex-girlfriend back when she is seeing someone else. Note that all the following methods apply to any relationship. Find one that works for you.
Understand what led to your breakup
If your girlfriend is the one that broke things up between you two, it’s important to understand the reason behind it. Sometimes, when breaking up with you, she will give you reasons for the breakup, and chances are that she already brought them up before, but you were too busy to take note of them or to listen.
In other cases, she might give you a vague reason that you can figure out why it happened. Maybe she felt that you were a good guy but too neutral. This makes her feel like a friend or even a big sister figure in your life.
For example, if she tells you that she doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore and needs time to herself then, she adds that she needs to figure herself out. She is most likely saying that you aren’t manly enough around her and that you are too insecure thus she needs you to exert some form of dominance or authority but in a loving manner. Such things she won’t tell you to your face and will expect you to figure it out on your own since she’s afraid she might end up teaching you the rest of your life.
Important to note is that girls are brought up under the societal norms that they are to be below men, and as much as this idea is archaic, most of them stick and live by these ideologies. So, as a man you might have to take charge of things in a big way but also let her know that you are in this together and she can take control if need be.
Don’t compare yourself to her new man
You might be hurt and also see her looking happy with her new man and thinking he’s better than me. This kind of thinking won’t win her back. Never look at him as being on your level or better than you. You’ve got to look at yourself as a champion and work on yourself if she gave you reasons why she broke up with you.
Don’t show her that you are lost without her
It’s ok to feel lost and sad when you lose the woman that you love, especially to another man. There’s nothing wrong with feeling hurt and still wanting your ex back. However, you need to make sure that she doesn’t see you lonely, depressed, confused, rejected, and sad without her. Each time you guys interact, ensure that she can feel and sense that you are doing ok. Do this subtly through actions as women can pick up cues and signals from a man’s conversation style and body language.
Meet up with her and attract her again
When you meet up with your ex-girlfriend and show her your new version while making her feel sexually attracted to you, it leaves her confused. She will start wondering why she is feeling attracted to you while she thought she had moved on and was happy with her new guy. Show her that you have changed and that you are still the right man for her.
Remember that you still have the upper hand, if her relationship is still new, so make the best of this opportunity.
Never ask her about her new man
When with your ex-girlfriend, do not mention or talk about her new boyfriend. She might try and place the jealousy card and is dying inside to tell you about her new boyfriend. Don’t also criticize her new man even if she says anything negative about him or compares him to you.
Keep your social media up to date
Post something on your social media regularly like you normally would when with her. Whether on Instagram or Facebook, make sure to post something positive about yourself and what you are up to. This will make her miss you when she stumbles upon your posts. She will eventually stalk you and create an interesting story about what you have been up to. Create something that will make her keep coming back and checking on you.
Conclusion
The biggest mistake most guys make when trying to win their ex-girlfriend back is that they just sit around waiting and do nothing. Some guys will cut off contact and go silent for up to even 60 days hoping that when out of sight and mind, she will miss them. However, if she isn’t attracted to you, then she isn’t going to feel motivated to get back to you. The new guy might be a possible rebound and it’s good to monitor before jumping to conclusions. Once this rebound relationship is over, you can then resume your conversations with her. Take it slow and use her vulnerability to your advantage.
James M. Reid
Relationships are complex according to James M. Reid, but there is always a way to make things work. The only problem is that people don’t want to make sacrifices for the greater good. Getting into a romantic relationship is one thing but to sustain the relationship is difficult and draining. For couples that are determined to make things work, James insists on them working on their relationship right from the very beginning. His mission is to build relationships from infancy and not when things start going south. James offers advice to teens. He advises them on how to treat a girl or a boy and even how to approach either gender for a blissful relationship going forward.