Being shy around girls can cost you relationships. We, humans, are social creatures that rely on communication to socialize. Shyness mostly comes from childhood with some people being able to gain confidence over time and overcoming it.
There are two types of shyness, – inward and outward. Inward shyness is when you feel shy due to low self-esteem, feeling inadequate, or shameful. Outward shyness is when you are afraid of revealing your inner self due to fear of criticism or lack of approval from others. One of the main reasons for shyness is fear of the girl not understanding you and accepting you the way you are.
When it comes to girls, it’s almost nearly impossible to win any of them if you are shy. It makes you look like a loser and even your male friends might start avoiding you or set you up for dates to tease you. It really helps to overcome your shyness when around girls. You not only gain confidence with time but also learn to navigate and situation.
I remember sometimes back when saw this beautiful chic at work but was hesitant in approaching her. I had a low self-esteem but overtime I overcame it through assistance and personal hard work. Several years later, I have used these tips to not only win her and other girls as well including my wife. I have decided to share the tips with you too to help you land the girl of your dreams.
How to overcome shyness around a girl
Knowing yourself and what you are capable of is the first step in the right direction. We are all nervous at some point in life especially when it matters the most. It could be a job interview or a meeting with someone important. It’s normal to be shy around a girl because you want to win by making her like you. To overcome it, you have to accept that you get shy around a girl and that almost everyone gets shy too. Also, you have to understand that girls too feel shy around guys, and most likely, the girl next to you is shy.
Identify what triggers the shyness
The best way to tackle a problem is to identify what causes it. Since you are afraid that the girl won’t accept you because of how look, your breath, what you say, etc, identify it. If you don’t find out the root cause of your shyness, it won’t be possible to overcome it. Once you have identified it, eliminate what you can and minimize what can’t be completely eliminated.
If it’s about your looks and you can’t change it, just accept who you are, someone will love you the way you are. Most of the time, a girl is focused on herself and might not care about your appearance. When going to meet a girl, be well-groomed and boost your confidence. Once you can control your looks, it’s time to meet her.
Be more social
When you practice, you get better, and eventually, it becomes natural. Most of the time, a shy guy around a girl is shy in any situation. A shy guy will avoid any social setting because he is shy when in social spaces.
To boost your confidence and shed off your shyness, you need to go to social events more. Interact with as many people as possible and get to express yourself around you. After all, most of them are strangers and would care less about you. Let yourself free and do what you fear the most. Begin with the more friendly social events and improve gradually.
Improve your body language
Body language is equally important as what you say. It will help you to project confidence and boost your confidence when around her. Keep your head up and constantly make eye contact. If you are feeling a bit shy, it’s ok to break eye contact once in a while.
Never use your phone when with her to overcome your shyness. Put it away and give her the attention she deserves. Do the occasional nodding and concurring to show that you understand what she is saying.
Pretend she is one of your friends
When chatting with your friend, be it a male or female friend, you are never shy, so why now? When you are around a girl that you like, just pretend that you have known her for a while and express yourself. She is no different from that female friend in your circle; you just need to know her better. This will help you relax and take it easy. Don’t worry, you don’t have to be perfect, she is also a human being. Come up with things to talk about and let it flow naturally.
One of the best ice breakers is by complimenting the girl. Keep it simple and be sincere about it. Take note of the simplest thing about her look and compliment her. This will show her that you are paying attention and you care making her feel special and even shy. You don’t necessarily have to start with one, if you notice that the conversation is stuck, you can then use it. You can also compliment her sense of humor or smile.
Ask her questions
One of the best ways to shed off your shyness around a girl is by asking her questions. Ask her simple questions that will help you get more than just a yes or no. This will show her that you care and she will say more than just the answer. This will make you feel at ease and help the conversation to keep flowing. However, to avoid being too inquisitive, read her reaction and also contribute to the topic. Don’t let her do all the talking.
Listen to her
By paying attention to what the girl says helps you to take your mind off what she thinks about you and get a better picture of who she is. Listen to her and get to ask questions or talk more about her interests. Do not interrupt her, wait for your turn to speak, or make her feel that you understand what she is saying.